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Vyzion Eyri
The Southern Legion RISE of LEGION
601
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Posted - 2013.05.06 09:12:00 -
[1] - Quote
Kira Lannister wrote:I awoke and found myself not in the same suit I was in. The smell of rust and glue flooded my sense. I looked at my hand, and I realized I had respawned. The captain found himself stumbling to his feet. He looked around in horror, he realized he was in the cargobay, something must have malfunctioned. He spawned into the body of a minmatar and he was locked in a cage. He looked around in horror, their was dubstep blasting in the back ground. The pink fluffies were loose. He had seen the used corpses of many clones laying around, and pink clone goo splattered all across the ground.
He found his way to a nearby airduct, before any of the wild inhabitants caught sight of him. He turned on the logistical scanning detective mode. He had a blue print lay out of the MCC. He made his way through the airducts back to the captains chair. He smelled a distinct odor. Vodka, cheap vodka. There it was, a drunk RDV pilot. Captain Lannister picked up the nova knife that laid next to the Vk.1 corpse. He turned it on, the light glow of the blade appeared. He walked up to the pilot and slit his throat while screaming GÇ£THATGÇÖS FOR ALL THE LAVSGÇ¥ The same moment he did that, it caused the drunk pilot to jerk the controls.
*MCC DID A BARREL ROLL!*
I watched the MCC do a barrel roll through the kittening tiny cockpit viewport of my dropship more eloquently than I ever could.
"I need to meet this pilot." I hit the thrusters... and I didn't accelerate at all.
"Hey, you guys back there. I told you we couldn't fit more than 20 or we'd never catch up with the MCC."
The heavies stowed in the cargo bay of my dropship, devoid of ISK to pay for tickets let alone the extra price on weight restrictions, had raided my quarters and forced me to fly them to the new world. Luckily for them, I had never gotten used to the totally cramped cubicle that I was meant to fit myself in to sleep, so I knocked myself out when I tried dicing the closest one with my nova knives under my pillow.
And when I woke up? Well, I found myself surrounded by HMG barrels. So here I was.
The rattling of an HMG went off and suddenly my bird lightened considerably.
"Nice work guys! How many'd you take out?"
The only response was more HMG fire, yells and screams and explosions. And suddenly, it all stopped.
I sighed. At least I could get to the MCC now.
Two minutes later, my dropship was inside the infantry deployment room, and the smell that hit me was... was like vodka, cheap perfume, gunpowder, vomit, trees, sweat, blood, guts, metal, peanuts and quafe was blended together and left in the sun to cook.
Which, as I stepped out of my dropship and checked the cargo bay to find that the heavies had all killed each other, I realised was probably not far from the truth.
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Vyzion Eyri
The Southern Legion RISE of LEGION
603
|
Posted - 2013.05.06 10:18:00 -
[2] - Quote
I watch in amazement as hundreds of Minmatar slaves pour out of my little Myron dropship and swarm onto the MCC, chattering excitedly about vodka and peanuts, which I know because those are the only two words I know in their language.
So this is why the ship was so heavy. Wasn't the heavies after all. |
Vyzion Eyri
The Southern Legion RISE of LEGION
603
|
Posted - 2013.05.06 10:45:00 -
[3] - Quote
Walk past gbghg not knowing he's going towards my dropship. Open a closet and see a naked flight attendant preparing herself for the Minmatarian dancing. I grin.
"This is definitely where I parked my dropship."
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Vyzion Eyri
The Southern Legion RISE of LEGION
604
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Posted - 2013.05.06 11:05:00 -
[4] - Quote
The naked flight attendant starts rumbling underneath me. That's it? I was disappointed. But she was still moaning, so I frowned. A roaring sound registered in my ears. It reminded me of my- oh hell no. I left my keys in the ignition.
"Sorry, honey. It's time to kick arse and save the day, and your butt doesn't seem like it can take much more kickin'." And with that tactless comment, I zip up my dropsuit zipper and open the door. |
Vyzion Eyri
The Southern Legion RISE of LEGION
604
|
Posted - 2013.05.06 11:21:00 -
[5] - Quote
I see the dropship plowing through the hallway, tearing up the interior of the MCC and taking almost no damage to its shields according to my HUD (did it upgrade? are we there yet?), and for a millisecond I allowed myself a moment to look proudly at how little collision damage it was taking before diving back on top of the flight attendant.
"Sorry honey, it seems-" my sentence was cut off by a slap.
"I WAS THIS CLOSE TO MY CLIMAX AND YOU RUINED IT!"
I just blinked. Then I gave her my nanite injector.
"If you finish off by injecting yourself the rush knock your socks off... if you had any on." And with that and a jaunting wink, I walked out carefully, ensuring no afterburning dropships would attempt to knock my own very comfortable warm socks off. |
Vyzion Eyri
The Southern Legion RISE of LEGION
605
|
Posted - 2013.05.06 11:56:00 -
[6] - Quote
Amidst the chaos, watching Snakes on a Plane, I notice the MCC stops.
"Sorry about the inconvenience, ladies and gentlemen, but it seems we're awaiting confirmation from DEV-3-13P0-R5 to be granted access into UPR1-51N6. Please stay seated and enjoy the flight." |
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