Silver Strike44
232
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Posted - 2014.12.02 01:17:00 -
[1] - Quote
I am here to tell you about our lord and savior nickmunson. He is a god. A deity. In addition to these things, he is the greatest player in all of dust. He only allows people to kill him to make them feel good about themselves as he is, after all, a kind, caring, and fair ruler of men. Since I am already listing adjectives in an attempt to illustrate how amazing nickmunson is, he is great, all-knowing, all-powerful, mighty, humble, better than you, and the greatest.
Moving on, I would like to tell you a bit about my experiences with this absolute beast of a god. I was, at one time, almost nickmunson's friend. Yes, the great munson almost bestowed his friendship onto me, a filthy peasant. Anyways, as I was in his presence longer and longer, I realized more and more how much of a god he was. It clearly didnt take long for me to realize this as you would have to be a huge gaylord to not do so. One day, in an ambush I was not present in, munson told his ple-filled team to get on the pipes or they would lose. The fools did not heed this warning so they inevitably were defeated despite having this absolute slayer on their team. Again, I wasnt present for that, so I have only heard stories of that teams scrubiness and, of course munson greatness. From then on, I learned that the pipes were to praised right alongside munson as he gave them his blessing.
Another time, I must have been doing something that munson did not approve of, like not actively worshipping him, because he threatened to come to my house and punch me in the face. I was petrified. No mortal could possibly survive that. I didnt sleep for four days. On the fifth day, I realized that my death would allow me to ascend to the plain of munson and be with him for eternity. I was then prepared to embrace his wrath. Instead of absolutely decimating me, the ever-wise munson just blocked me.
Today, even though munson has me permamuted, I am his prophet and his apostle. Now, for the the commandments of munson, but first you must understand that that his preferred playstyle consists of him raining down destruction from the pipes in the form of rempte explosives.
1. Always carry remote explosives.
2. Always get on the pipes.
3. Always throw remote explosives from the pipes.
4. Always get multiple kills with remote explosives.
5. nickmunson is the greatest thing to ever exist and he shall be treated as such.
6. Always cry about not getting enough kills with remote explosives.
7. If you are to use a gun instead of remote explosives and break most of the other commandments on this list, that weapon will be a shotgun.
8. Devote your life to munson or be smote.
9. Praise munson.
10. Praisie the pipes.
Finally here are just a few websites where you can find devotion to many forms.
www.nickmunsonisjesus.com
www.praisethepipes.org
www.REcentral.gov
www.nickmunsonisthegreatesthumanbeingtoeverlive.edu (even though munson isnt really a human, this is still a good site to learn of his greatness.)
www.cum2urhousnpunchuinthefaceuflaminfaget.web/praisethepipes
www.youwillneverbeanywherenearasgreatasmunsonatanythingyouscrub.gitgud
www.damplips.com
www.thewrathofmunsonisendlessandunforgiving.co.uk
Now, go out and tell your friends, your family, your dog, your teacher, yourself, your pastor, your birds, the ocean, your favorite box of cereal, and your fellow dust players how great nickmunson is.
Praise munson. Praise the pipes.
www.nickmunsonisjesus.com
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