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Thread Statistics | Show CCP posts - 3 post(s) |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
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Posted - 2013.01.10 02:47:00 -
[1] - Quote
*pokes a nearby sitting merc with his elbow*
Hey, mate, do you know how effective is the mail system here? It's the first time I'm sendin' ten Prometheuses to the Air Marshall. Too afraid they'll get stuck somewhere in Jita, you know.
Foley Jones wrote:Val'herik Dorn wrote:I'll nano inject whereever and whom ever I please. So... who wants millions of tiny robots inside them?  Well Its going to be a long flight...scew. it, hit me up man
Oh man, who does this with syringes now'days? Hey Dorn, move over, a pro's comin'.
*gets out a REP Tool (Recreational Electronic Paramedic Toolkit), puts it straight to Foley's head and presses the trigger*
Now there is a big line of 'em little bastards beggin' to enter your head. A lot better, eh? |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:10:00 -
[2] - Quote
Kira Lannister wrote:All passengers, please ctfu (calm the fuzz up). This is Captain Lannister, I have noticed many a merc harassing the female merc attendants. We would like you to remember, you need a "dolla if you wanna holla". We ask you kindly not to inject other mercs with your nanite injectors filling them with millions of tiny robots, because it is borderline homoerotic and creepy. We are not in coloradian airspace, so please turn in any quafeabis you all have been smoking. We have added a new movie to our play list to remind all passengers what happens when you get too crunk/cray on a flight vessel. Conair
See, I told ya'll REP Tools are not prohibited... A'right?
Anyway, anyone bother to sell me a bottle of water for an ISK? I'll give you a discount for your next REP session. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:15:00 -
[3] - Quote
Maken, please tune your music down a bit... I kinda don't stand this type, man. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:21:00 -
[4] - Quote
*jumps in his seat* Whoa, did this ship jus' do a barrel roll? VERMAAK!!! |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:25:00 -
[5] - Quote
Vermaak Doe wrote:Ner'Zul Nexhawk wrote:Kira Lannister wrote:All passengers, please ctfu (calm the fuzz up). This is Captain Lannister, I have noticed many a merc harassing the female merc attendants. We would like you to remember, you need a "dolla if you wanna holla". We ask you kindly not to inject other mercs with your nanite injectors filling them with millions of tiny robots, because it is borderline homoerotic and creepy. We are not in coloradian airspace, so please turn in any quafeabis you all have been smoking. We have added a new movie to our play list to remind all passengers what happens when you get too crunk/cray on a flight vessel. Conair See, I told ya'll REP Tools are not prohibited... A'right? Anyway, anyone bother to sell me a bottle of water for an ISK? I'll give you a discount for your next REP session. Of course, but all I have is lemonade. WAIT that's not lemonade, it's just lemonade flavored. So how did you like that lemonade flavord uranium?
Yeah, that'll work, mate. But I'm afraid you won't get your discount, I need my compensation for nearly flippin' out of my seat. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:26:00 -
[6] - Quote
Maken Tosch wrote:Ner'Zul Nexhawk wrote:*jumps in his seat* Whoa, did this ship jus' do a barrel roll? VERMAAK!!! He climaxed in the lavatory.
Not only that, but he made a friggin' Neocom call! *Cough* How worse can this flight get? |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:32:00 -
[7] - Quote
Vermaak Doe wrote:Ner'Zul Nexhawk wrote:*jumps in his seat* Whoa, did this ship jus' do a barrel roll? VERMAAK!!! It wasn't me, it was Drake. Now just go back to sleep (pulls out anus Nova knife) and that isn't blood coming out your neck, I spilled my strawberry quafe.
Mate, you know these kids' toys don't work on me, no sir.
*Presses his REP Tool to the neck, squeezes the trigger and relaxes*
Ah, tha's better. But you owe me two hundred thousand ISK now, man, I need my moral compensation. You neckstabber. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:44:00 -
[8] - Quote
Vermaak Doe wrote:Ner'Zul Nexhawk wrote:Vermaak Doe wrote:Ner'Zul Nexhawk wrote:*jumps in his seat* Whoa, did this ship jus' do a barrel roll? VERMAAK!!! It wasn't me, it was Drake. Now just go back to sleep (pulls out anus Nova knife) and that isn't blood coming out your neck, I spilled my strawberry quafe. Mate, you know these kids' toys don't work on me, no sir. *Presses his REP Tool to the neck, squeezes the trigger and relaxes* Ah, tha's better. But you owe me two hundred thousand ISK now, man, I need my moral compensation. You neckstabber. *stabs your repping hand and pins it to the fuselage* Whatcha gonna do now? *takes your wallet* here's your chump change *throws isk on the floor*
*takes out the knife with his healthy hand and throws it in Vermaak, impaling the latter's chest*
Once again, doesn't work one bit. *opens a panel on his dropsuit for a moment and then closes it* Rep modules, mate, best in industry.
*Looks on the floor and laughs* Heh, always does the trick. You really thought those were real ISKs and not just worthless papers? All my money is here *taps his helmet* Go back to what you've been doin', I'm done with you, man. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 03:45:00 -
[9] - Quote
Maken Tosch wrote:*Vermaak gets tackled by a Concord Air Marshall*
Oops, sorry officer, hope his deviled knife didn't scratch you. Please restrain 'im in the cargo bay. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:03:00 -
[10] - Quote
*walks out of the cargo bay, rips his clone's helmet out of Vermaak's hand and strikes a blow with it on the latter's head, driving him unconscious* They never learn, do they? Maken, please take care of his twin, I remember seein' a shotgun stickin' from under you seat.
*presses the internal ship comms button* Flight Attendant Sortana, just dealt with one of 'em. However, I'm afraid we need more Concord officers, the fat guys are gettin' serious. I'll try to help the ones here, but it's not enough. *plunges a nanite injector in a lifeless Marshall's heart* That'll do for now. Com' on, officer, get up. I'll come back to you later when we're done with these buccaneers. |
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Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:06:00 -
[11] - Quote
Foley Jones wrote:.....did anyone hear a snake just now?
Huh, I see my REP Tool is working as intended. Good to hear.  |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:19:00 -
[12] - Quote
Vermaak 'Fatal' Kuvakei wrote:Wake up Doe, we've more work to *shoots Ner'Zul in the liver* we can take these Concord fools
Do I have to explain again? Oh, a'right, you were in the bathroom when I showed my rep modules. Come back to sleep *takes his previous helmet and bashes Kuvake with it, driving him unconscious as well* Seems like we're clear, mates! Now, if someone would kindly help me drag 'em kids into the cargo bay...
Enkidu Camuel wrote:Why... darn! I can't open this bag of peanuts, someone has Nova Knifes here?
*grabs the Nova Knife that previously stuck out of Vermaak Doe's chest and tosses it safely over to Enkidu* Here you go, man. Enjoy your peanuts! |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:21:00 -
[13] - Quote
Frodaris Sortana wrote:To all passengers: it would appear that some of your peers want to cause a ruckus, allow me to give you my response. "pulls out Prototype Scrambler Pistol" Please hold on to something tight, for we might experience turbulence whilst I pop heads.
Glad you've finally arrived, we had a mess with these guys. *sits down in his seat and relaxes* So, anyone of you mates wants to get a REP session? |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:30:00 -
[14] - Quote
Vermaak 'Fatal' Kuvakei wrote:Ner'Zul Nexhawk wrote:Vermaak 'Fatal' Kuvakei wrote:Wake up Doe, we've more work to *shoots Ner'Zul in the liver* we can take these Concord fools Do I have to explain again? Oh, a'right, you were in the bathroom when I showed my rep modules. Come back to sleep *takes his previous helmet and bashes Kuvake with it, driving him unconscious as well* Seems like we're clear, mates! Now, if someone would kindly help me drag 'em kids into the cargo bay... Enkidu Camuel wrote:Why... darn! I can't open this bag of peanuts, someone has Nova Knifes here? *grabs the Nova Knife that previously stuck out of Vermaak Doe's chest and tosses it safely over to Enkidu* Here you go, man. Enjoy your peanuts! You do realize I Svered your spine with said Nova knives right?
Said "previously", mate. And that was my clone's spine and your twin doin' this horrible deed. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:32:00 -
[15] - Quote
Maken Tosch wrote:So, how long have we been flying so far?
Four and a half hours now... Man, I'm tired of this rubbish. Now that we've got the Flight Attendant with us, I'll calmly go to sleep for the rest o' the flight. *leans back in his chair and falls asleep* |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:37:00 -
[16] - Quote
Maken Tosch wrote:@Frodaris
Party pooper.
*Wakes up from the sharp remark* Nah, mate, I for one thank him. I don't *yawn* have that many clones left in the cargo bay, and if those drunk kids come out to play again... Well, it's not gonna be nice, I can say that. Anyway, good night. *falls asleep* |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:45:00 -
[17] - Quote
Maken Tosch wrote:https://urbummed.files.wordpress.com/2011/08/sharpie-face.jpg
Aargh, what is on my helmet? *looks at Maken* Not cool, mate, not cool at all. Vermaak, did you even hear the attendant's transmission? I thought he warned you quite well. And stop talking about slaves, you filthy, arrogant Amart. *goes back to sleeping with a snore* |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 04:59:00 -
[18] - Quote
God darn it, no sleep in 'em spaceships...
Kira Lannister wrote:Vermaak Doe wrote:Kira Lannister wrote:BetterHideGood wrote:*Crawls out from under the luggage compartment and sneaks into a seat...* *Walks up and down MCC* *Notices ducktape on mercs dropsuit.* ... Excuse me sir, I am conducting a random seat check. May I see your New Eden Passport? *sneaks into captain's quarters* *Stops passport check on BetterHideGood* *Sprints to cabin door* STOP THESE SHENANIGANS! OPEN UP!
*gripes his REP Tool* I got you locked on my repairer, Captain. The stream is so powerful his shotgun won't hurt you one bit. |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 05:04:00 -
[19] - Quote
Frodaris Sortana wrote:"Gets sent flying threw the bathroom door by the explosion and lands on Jesse Jayne"
Uh... hi there corp mate!
*runs over to Sortana and locks on him with the REP Tool* Take it easy, mate, I'll take care of this. You a'right? Thanks for finally eliminating those two bandits. I have a suspicion they were sent here to cause chaos on purpose, though... *squints his eyes and looks around their section* |
Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 05:06:00 -
[20] - Quote
Vermaak Doe wrote:*Survives shot and pulls the pn off fodaris's grenade so he blows up before shooting kuvakei*
- we're in feythabolis Drake, bring the thanatos!
~ Roger, engaging now
So that's what an afterlife must be, eh? An alternative reality with a different course o' events. Officer, we gotta get those two guys to the scientists ASAP once we are at our destination. |
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Ner'Zul Nexhawk
Talos Incorporated
153
|
Posted - 2013.01.10 16:37:00 -
[21] - Quote
Vermaak Doe wrote:You do realize you can't be revived from headshots right? *both get up and pin you to the ground*
*wakes up* Yeah, we've landed, mates! Finally... *sees the two Vermaaks getting into a mess again* Kids, you forgot about the clones. I bet Sortana's got ten o' 'em on this ship.
*Gets out his REP Tool, sets the setting to "Extreme" and presses it to Doe's head* Sorry, I'd really want not to do this, mate, but this option works only on a very specific type of Heavy dropsuit... Which you don't have. Goodbye, kid. *Presses the trigger, quickly points the Tool to other Vermaak and squeezes the trigger for the second time. Both of them explode in a swarm of nanite robots, due to their dropsuits not being able to hold such big count* Officer, you may dispose of their clones through the airlock while I'll be gettin' off this metal barrel full o' drunkards. See you on the battlefield, mates! *packs his suitcase and gets off the ship* |
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