Zatara Rought
Fatal Absolution
Bleeding Sun Conglomerate
5
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Posted - 2015.10.28 07:49:00 -
[1] - Quote
If I wrote down the history of dust as I'm aware of it jesus...that'd be a long ass ******* story.
And I'd be as thorough as mentioning **** thats so in depth you'd need an appendix to go look up wtf I'm talking about when I write ****...like the time I tried to convince dubbs to make an alliance with 187. and pro hic so that eon wouldn't become unsustainably dominant...or the original one man farm district...aka Kaitlin Stacy Doo...I'd have to mention people you probably never got the pleasure to play with like PTSD or Coin...you'd get a big earful about how I didn't have the confidence to make FA, but the matches I lead and fced for Lol MHPD was the catalyst for skeletor and himiko to urge me to create a corp...and it wold have been called poonswarm if Skel had his way.
I'd have to show you the very first corp battle I ever played back when I was in subdreddit. And the nasty number if matches I loved playing with pal and csrsample for I'll omens because Nikia was the most chasimatic leader I ever knew. That man would **** on us all about how bad we were and we still loved him...I wasn't even in his ******* corp. I remember the team getting chewed out after a laggy match vs serephim and I'm sending and receiving hatemail with sha over his dual flaylcoks...and I thought to myself...I'm voluntarily allowing some other corp leader to rip me a new *******..I AIN'T EVEN MAD THAT'S AMAZING!
I'd have to remind you of the enormous efforts of deadeyes antiere in providing MH's amazing coverage early on...and id probably detail the various meta's and how it helped to propel certain corps to fortune and relevancy.
I'd touch on beta and the history I gleaned from others about pretty Jan 12th ;)...I'd probably even have to remind you about the TERRIBLE sp system we had back then...daily cap. I remember reg and I stressing about it
There's so many people that i crossed paths with at some poimt and cookiestein, piercing, hawkin, mavado, reg, sota, heim, skel, xero, ghost, dwater, tba, funk master whale...the list is literally so long it pains me to think about them because it's so ******* fleeting.
Nothing Ever Stays
So many of these people will never be more than a blip...and yet you have this feeling when you meet people...it's as if your own sense of loyalty weakens for a moment because the charisma these people have. You just want so badly to be friends with people like that.
Sure, no one is perfect...I'm the most insanely mistake prone tilting asshat who ever failblogged their way into an influential position.
I STILL think sometimes to those voices from subdreddit. DS, bears beets, ellithana mori...Ill probably never cross paths with any of them again. You know how many times I've had gershe or torr wrath on my mind and been sick thinking about the logs of **** my remaining friends passed on about what was said about me? So much cancer dude...was about as bad as when I was running for CPM and it was like a Republican convention with nut heads questioning my capacity to serve on the cpm because FA was in DNS...oh man.
I used to try to add the narwhal guard channel in game...and cry a little on the inside. Same with the TP channel when cubs kicked me over the peanuts amount of is I asked for to start FA since TP was dead. The word "nestegg" is now a euphemism for avarice. I literally thought of Cubs when I watched the battle of 5 armies lol. It's why respected kujo and emulated him so I too could claim to be the brokest CEO of dust.
For all the trolling I've earned in my time very little ever hurt as much as when someone you thought was your friend or you simply wanted badly to be friends with them...and yet ended up being nothing close.
Certain people hated me for being inclusive and for always taking the side of the one vs the many . But I've been on the side where you're a nobody who wants to pew pew with chill homies. And Ive been on the side where people with influence and tenure poison people against you. State property probably hasn't thought about me in years...and yet I think about so many cool people like coin and piercing in pfb Ive wanted to pop in to enjin and swe whats good. Another channel I haven't forgotten and mourn along with sand castles, plantains, narwhal guard, and many many more.
I don't hold it against state though..for all I know he's just a tad who mistook something I said..of was angry I joined TP so quickly after PFBHZ disbanded.
Only dude I'll ever consider hating is radar.
I'll always think of radar whenever people ask if I've ever hated someone on dust. I thought cubs had him all wrong...but he was exactly as advertised. When you sacrifice **** to do stuff for others only to have them spit in your face and then run back to blitz and others you look up and convince them of some dastardly plan involving ulterior motives??? Oh man...
I guess props to him when people acquiesce their skepticism you can be spoon fed anything. The people who believe radar about anything would make great scientologists.
Maybe it's just me but history is less about events and more about people.
I read briefly some of these other posts...like OH rewriting history about leaving the game for destiny when in reality OH became the very thing it despised and the result was cat dog and fusion coming back to FA...and we started face rolling OH...and then OH and FA quit. Yeah OH had been getting the best of us using our own players...but when fusion and doggy came back oh got rick rolled. OH hit FA in the midst of a rebuild and called us weak...boy the Ole pot calling the kettle black there...compare that to the way we treated OH when they were rebuilding...arms wide open. That was almost as disappointing as the way Cap repaid us for supporting their pleas to remain in TSO...despite it costing us a team players going to OH and elsewhere because they didn't want to be in a blue donut with cap.
I'm done drunk posting. Troll away.
I'm irrelevant, feel free to ignore me. :)
No matter what. FAmily
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Zatara Rought
Fatal Absolution
Bleeding Sun Conglomerate
5
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Posted - 2015.10.28 16:16:00 -
[2] - Quote
Quote:Funny, I had the pleasure of watching old IMP/PFB PC videos and the Urgent Fury TP/AE fights where Zatara was fighting just a few days ago. It made me realize: coming into dust the week of Uprising, building a corp out of Uprising babies....I was a shrimp among giants. The struggle to quarry a mole hill in the shadow of mansions. A pawn front lined by bishops, knights, queens, all the while having no idea I was playing a 2D chess game with people who could see the game board from above - marionettes of men. Though I may have carved what measly mark I could in our history, it means absolutely NOTHING without the PEOPLE who entrusted me to lead them; those who bought into a philosophy, a direction, a drive and directive. The guys who stuck around when you get removed from PC entirely. The guys who x'd up no matter the opponent, grinded when isk was scarce, followed FC orders to utter and certain demise.
Can I just say that the portion towards the end is rather elegant and persuasive
Quote:Zat can be the first to confirm, the ins and outs of leadership in the MH world is a saga in itself. The shady deals, pursuit of the almighty isk, blue-ing, red-ing, "gray"-ing. Those moments where one decision literally was the fate of a corporation in its entirety, whether on the district or in the diplo. In reality, for a leader like those I listed, I know one thing is for sure: everything is for the men. Every fight with my ex, the bar nights skipped, the 10+ hours of dust daily, the list goes on -- all to ensure an enjoyable and memorable experience for the guys you've come to love on your team.
-sigh- very few people know wtf you're talking about. And even then there's distinctions between CEO's, CEO's of PC corps...and CEO's of PC corps that actually have enough clout to effect their destiny. Getting in fights with your wife and failing over and over to explain why you care so much about a damn PC fight and the number of times my friends would complain that I was't going to [insert event here] because i had **** to get done on dust...trying to strike a balance between Rl and the demands of being a CEO...especially in a corp where you haven't quite gotten leadership to the point where the corp will function without you...it's a weight on your chest like nothing else.
in short: Confirmed
Quote:I remember quite clearly the day you told me we would be red Zat, I would be removed from Tso's. At the time, OH was smashing us on the daily, and FA was no showing their own battles vs OH.
Actually it was like 2 weeks after DNS imploded and I was still in the failed attempt that was TLoD iirc. I really want to check the logs on this if possible because I could have sworn it was in mid June...which was really pre OH issues, we were still at the tail end of removing HVLP and losing 60% of our battles vs ERA in the wake of FA's a-team leaving the game post red wedding and the AE fusion not really working out.
Think logically about that time. I'd told Kujo that after DNS was gone Renegade would leave Tso's and go their way. OH wasn't really an issue until AFTER I lost even more players. They became a problem when I went back to FA.
I honestly recall it being a situation where...I honestly loved Cap aside from Noneck (and I had frost kitty still so who was I to talk) I always thought really highly of you which is why it hurt when **** got nasty toward me when I really didn't want it that way.
We weren't no showing battles vs OH until full rebuild happened which is when Skel took over as CEo when I went on vacation in July to go visit my wife's grandfather who'd had a stroke. I came back and Skel had mostly righted the ship in my absence. I was there for the OH no shows for about 3 days before I left...and we just didn't have the players. Activity then was so damn low. This was before Devin even came over iirc. When Devin and their crew came...that was the shot in the arm we desperately needed to have a consistent 16 on. We lacked ADS hard in those days and Doc was really giving it everything but he just wasn't enough by himself. Derrith was for w/e reason super infrequent.
To be more brief. When I relented and agreed to keep Cap and co in Tso's...we were in no way getting **** on by OH. FA wasn't even fighting OH till after ERA imploded...and the reason OH came at FA according to Tibs...because we were a blue donut.
We were losing to ERA after they merged with HVLP with TLoD failing in most respects. You say you never heard of being kicked out again and make an insinuation that it had to do with the fact you were fairly even with OH/ERA. The absence of the notion of kicking Renegade corps is not proof we felt the necessity t keep you. I told you you could stay...I never thought anything else of it after until Cap left TSO's. Once I said you were in...I was all in. And I would have defended keeping Cap even if we'd all lost all of our districts.
Allowing Roman to join wasn't my call. I think you would remember how much my favorability rating toward roman had changed because of the way he acted in ERA.
Furthermore...I never said you caused Tso's to be a blue donut. Others of my corp left because that was their feeling.
I can't say definitively Tso's would not have been a blue donut even if all the RA corps had left, that's a whole lot of speculation I don't care to engage in.
Tso's was never scared of PE...at least I wasn't...hell I had no qualms taking their districts and we forced them off the map without incident. I didn't want it that way..I just wanted the Kad district they took from Tso's. But rampy wanted a war and he bit off more than he could chew.
Fast forward to leadership issues between Cap and FA..this is where I really have to go with you on this. Lags and Devin wanted to farm and I can't backseat drive from Destiny..when I came back to dust the damage in my eyes was pretty well done. Water under the bridge indeed.
I'm irrelevant, feel free to ignore me. :)
No matter what. FAmily
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