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Aeon Amadi
Chimera Core
8604
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Posted - 2015.02.09 23:15:00 -
[1] - Quote
The Differential Theory of Dust 514 Clone Troopers (Snake Model) upon encountering a snake in the Area of Operations.
LIGHT FRAMES
Amarr Scout. Spends several minutes chasing snake while cloaked, citing that lack of sprint speed in combination with high stamina rendered operator ineffective to deal with situation. Operator cites lack of Amarrian weapons with a heavy development bias toward Caldari technology (including aforementioned cloaking device).
Caldari Scout. Successfully reveals the location of snake with perfect accuracy at a range of fifty meters to entire squad but cites inability to successfully sneak up on the target without receiving damage despite utilizing high agility to outmaneuver the snake and survive. Snake seemed confused claiming that it had bitten the scout GÇ£at least a dozen timesGÇ¥.
Gallente Scout. Snuck up on the snake despite having several layers of heavy armor plating and incapacitated snake with several barrages more than necessary from plasma-based shotgun. Snake was killed, completely unaware of Gallente Scout in question, but Gallente Scout claims that the snake could see him on short-range scans.
Minmatar Scout. Filleted snake with charged nova knives and emptied entire breach SMG magazine into the corpse citing that the snake had back-pedaled out of range of nova knives. Claimed that all reptiles move too fast, feeling GÇÿrobbedGÇÖ of a successful kill. Proceeded to hack this articl-@1$ >>--<\\\\\error:4004 fot nound
(???) Pilot. Had showed initial signs of promise but had vanished quickly afterward.
MEDIUM FRAMES
Amarr Assault. Expended all ammunition in magazine from standard issue Scrambler Rifle despite the initial charged shot disintegrating snake. Scrambler Rifle sent in for repairs due to claims of overheating but none were found. Operator cites lack of Amarrian weapons with a heavy development bias toward Caldari technology.
Caldari Assault. Expended all ammunition in local supply depot, forming a 50m crater at snakeGÇÖs last known location. Cited that additional reload speed was useless and heavy recoil from rail weaponry rendered operator ineffective at assigned task.
Gallente Assault. Missed snake with all round of standard issue Assault Rifle, citing weaponry is GÇ£too accurate to liberate the **** out of OPFORGÇ¥. Attempts to use other plasma-based weaponry were ineffective as suitGÇÖs design did not apply with operator citing that he could not get within range. ADDENDUM: Has since begun using Assault Rail Rifle and claimed great success.
Minmatar Assault. Continued firing weaponry at snake until it had fallen apart due to general lack of maintenance. Became visibly distraught when peers claimed that operator was GÇ£more of a heavy scout than an assaultGÇ¥.
Amarr Logistics. Praised high command for issuance of sidearm but became overly critical of standard issue drop uplinks, citing that the lack of efficient bonuses applied to said drop uplinks after he had become incapacitated by snake. Operator cites lack of Amarrian weapons with a heavy development bias toward Caldari technology.
Caldari Logistics. Became distraught over application of standard issue nanohives, asking for a sidearm to become more efficient at killing snake (recon teams were dispatched to find said snake as it had escaped the AO during initial debate). Became visibly angry when offered a repair tool as compensation. Explained that implementation of equipment bandwidth would harm his role despite having been a known Sentinel in his spare time.
Gallente Logistics. Operator was delighted at the knowledge that Active Scanners would have higher efficiency with his use due to team-based application. After thirty minutes, became aggressive citing that he could not find four species of snake (despite only one being in AO at the time) due to heavily dampened profile application and GÇ£lack of roleGÇ¥ due to aforementioned snakes performing a GÇ£similar jobGÇ¥. Became violent when peers expressed discontent with having been scanned.
Minmatar Logistics. Wounded snake in initial encounter then worked feverishly to save the snakeGÇÖs life but was unsuccessful due to snake GÇ£not having called for helpGÇ¥. Operator had also spent several minutes looking in areas that no corpse was found, claiming that he GÇ£could still see the beacon on his HUDGÇ¥. Firmware updates were issued.
Have a suggestion for the Planetary Services Department?
Founder of AIV
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Aeon Amadi
Chimera Core
8604
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Posted - 2015.02.09 23:16:00 -
[2] - Quote
HEAVY FRAMES
Amarr Commando. Successfully killed snake with Laser Rifle but was sent to triage due to burns. Operator cites lack of Amarrian weapons with a heavy development bias toward Caldari technology.
Caldari Commando. Sent snake flying several hundred kilometers into the atmosphere from a successful headshot from a Charge Sniper Rifle before turning body into piecemeal with rail rifle secondary. Operator claimed he was unable to effectively engage target due to lack of variable zoom.
Gallente Commando. Fired off single Plasma Cannon round, presumably killing snake (we have yet to find a body) and making presentation as to the necessary skill involved not matching up with the potential damage output. Operator was sent to triage after having been grievously wounded by aforementioned plasma cannon when, GÇ£dumb*** newberry walked right infront of meGÇ¥.
Minmatar Commando. Sent 50+ Mass Driver rounds down-range followed by barrage of Swarm Launcher missiles to kill snake. ADS Pilot (in a different sector) exclaimed that his weaponry was too powerful for the aforementioned job and pressed charges citing inability to escape GÇ£ghost missilesGÇ¥.
Amarr Sentinel. Killed snake (we think) with several barrages of Burst Heavy Machine Gun after snake attacked operator from behind, inflicting minor wounds. Body could not be located. Operator claimed inefficiency due to GÇ£slow movement and lack of EWARGÇ¥, expressing that it was too easy for the snake to GÇ£get the jump on himGÇ¥. Operator cites lack of Amarrian weapons with a heavy development bias toward Caldari technology. Operator cites lack of heavy weaponry with heavy development bias toward GÇ£everything elseGÇ¥.
Caldari Sentinel. Performed similarly, as expected, to Amarr Sentinel. Operator claimed that the suit was GÇ£useless due to extreme armor bias in AOGÇ¥ and that GÇ£flux grenades should be nerfed to the groundGÇ¥ despite none having been used by snake. Operator cites lack of heavy weaponry with heavy development bias toward GÇ£everything elseGÇ¥.
Gallente Sentinel. Performed similarly, as expected, to Amarr Sentinel. Altercation ensued when operator explained to the operator of the Caldari Sentinel that he should, GÇ£get goodGÇ¥. Operator cites lack of heavy weaponry with heavy development bias toward GÇ£everything elseGÇ¥.
Minmatar Sentinel. Performed exceptionally well despite taking more serious wounds from the snake. Former CPM representative became erratic, exclaiming, GÇ£HOLY **** THAT THING IS FASTGÇ¥ Operator cites lack of heavy weaponry with heavy development bias toward GÇ£everything elseGÇ¥. 16.
Have a suggestion for the Planetary Services Department?
Founder of AIV
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Nocturnal Soul
Primordial Threat
5277
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Posted - 2015.02.09 23:24:00 -
[3] - Quote
Sounds about right....
(Gê¬n+Ç-´)GèâGöüGÿån+ƒ.pâ+n+ín+ƒ.
LASERS BTCH!!!!!!
The Incursions are back... and they're golden baby!
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