Their Toilet paper products are not made from silky smooth, organic space sheep wool!

Complaints of bum rashes, allergic reactions from the synthetic ingredients used to develop their number one products have been systematically silenced all over the cluster to prevent a drop in sales.

More Radical protesters have been reported to be assassinated in public areas, but were planned, and executed to look like accidents! Sometimes Vehicles of TP competitors were used in the incidents. Some protesters were also found to be hung by their toes with an extremely durable type of TP toilet paper, and left to starve. Most victims were also found to have had diarrhea problems. autopsies found that they were fed a powerful laxative as a form of torture, often leaving them to bathe in their own faces.

Mothers report that the use of the Team Players baby Brand TP have caused irreversible swelling on children in the age range of 2 months, to 3 years old. Side affects usually vary.

Decomposing TP brand toilet paper have also been reported to leak a type of liquid substance that causes Cancer in most aquatic life that are often farmed, and produced as food for the clusters growing populace.

Do not buy TP brand Toilet paper!

Protect your anus.

Most victims were also found to have had diarrhea problems. autopsies found that they were fed a powerful laxative as a form of torture, often leaving them to bathe in their own faces.

They were left to bathe in their on faces? How awful!